Waiting Patiently…

I miss her so much.

In less than four week’s time, I was left behind twice.  The second time was just last Saturday.  She’s probably waking up right now to a wonderful Minneapolis Monday morning and preparing her morning-required coffee.  I wish we never had to part ways, but her work demands that she be there to undergo her training.  I guess I just need to be thankful that her travels right now are not as lengthy as they were before.  I remember being left behind for more or less eight straight months, until I was able to convince her to just come home to me.

This time, I should probably be thankful that it’s only for a couple of weeks, and that sources of communicating with each other are pretty much everywhere.  I can’t imagine the two of us being in our parents’ place where the communication they had to go through was strictly by sending actual mail to each other which would probably arrive once or twice a month, when our dads would be in Saudi Arabia, working their butts of so that they could give us a better future.  I’m also happy that she’s able to go to places I’ve been to, without us having to worry about coming up with airfare.  I remember being in the Mall of America in Minneapolis, Minnesota, and admired how huge the place was.  I think I was there for at least 5 hours but was only able to see one side of the building since it was really a huge mall.  Someday I’ll probably go back there and make it a point to be able to check the entire mall out, regardless of how huge it is.

Anyways, being apart from each other is something I’m not used to anymore.  We have been living together for close to five years now and the longest we’ve been apart was when I went to the US back in February, to attend my sister’s wedding.  I have to admit that I have gotten quite used to being with her almost every minute of the day.  We even have stations facing each other, so that I could catch a glimpse of her beaming face every chance that I can get.  I remember she caught me one time staring at her while she was working.  I felt like a high school kid getting caught by my crush while I was staring.  It was both embarrassing and heart-warming.  How many people can get a chance to be able to look their beloved every minute of the day and actually be happy and feel warm about it?  I know couples who can’t wait to be apart from each other, couples who, after being with each other for twenty-five years, would rather part ways, or just argue with each other.  For my sweetie and I, even after ten long years, it still feels like we are starting over and over again every time weekend comes.  I’m sure we both feel the same way when I say that I wish weekends would have been made three instead of two days so that we can have more time to spend with each other. 

Though we have a couple of minor arguments every now and then, because of the foundation we have built through the years, everything can be brushed off easily, or talked about like mature and professional people.  I guess there are a lot of reasons why I am very grateful to be in this relationship; being in it has taught me several things and have made me grow the way nothing else could ever make me.  I’ve learned to think of the future all the time and how each action I make could have a significant impact on our future.  Every action was critical, and that I must make sure every one I made was going to be for both our benefit.

I miss her so much.  I miss being able to hold her close to me every weekend and just before I fall asleep. I can’t tell how much I’ve gotten used to falling asleep with her in my arms, trying to protect her even as I fall asleep.  It feels heavy waking up not being able to see her sleeping like the angel she is beside me, and not being able to prepare her daily dose of caffeine juice.  I even miss the weight of her laptop bag on my right shoulder when I walk to the office.  I miss the way she looks like when she eats beside me while we’re at home.  It’s like I don’t have any purpose when she’s not around.  I think God sent me here so that I can make her life more comfortable, which I hope and believe I am able to fulfill.

Now, all I can do is wait; wait until she comes home and is back in my arms once again.  All I can do is sit at home or in front of my desk, try to keep myself busy so that time will pass by easily so that before I know it, I’m already waiting at the ground floor of our building for our company’s van to bring her back to me.  Wait until I am able to make her life a little bit more comfortable, less complicated.

God please let her be safe.  Until then, I’ll be here, waiting patiently for her…

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