December 5, 2008, sometime around 10:00pm
When I got to work, I went to one of her good friends’s office, Junelle, and told her that I was going to ask her for a small favor. She stopped what she was doing and asked me what the favor was. I went a few steps closer to her, so that I would block the view from outside her door, and that she was going to be the only one to see. I took the ring out of my pocket and she instantly beamed. I was expecting a different reaction but since she was just recently married and just went through the whole nine yards of it, then I guess it’s understandable that her reaction was a bit “lesser” than what I expected. Anyways, after a few minutes of checking out the ring, the first few words that came out of her was that she would like to volunteer the red ring box that she had to replace the box that the store gave me to hold the ring with. She said that she will be bringing it to work the next morning, just half a day before the big event. I asked her the favor, which is to make sure that as much as possible, she will be with my sweetie during the party, and that she is not to be out of her sight at any time. She smiled at me and agreed, promising that she will be 100% with her during the entire night of the party.
I went to another one of our friends, Sir Ron, and asked him for another favor. I showed him the ring and ‘congratulations’ was the instant reaction. He asked me what I needed from him and I simply told him to be with Ethel and Junelle during the night, that all of them are to keep her well rested and free from all other influences during the night, and that they are all to stay in one place, as much as possible.
Finally, most of the pieces are finally in place.
I went around the production floor and I remember some of the agents who I may have divulged the story to asked me if the plan was going well. I took the ring out of my pocket and there was a half-second of either a gasp or a scream that came out of everyone around me. They all saw how nice and simple the ring I chose was and that they were already congratulating me. I even remember a comment from a former agent of mine who was already a quality analyst at the time: “I wonder when someone will give me a ring like this one…?” I was still ecstatic and happy with how everything was going, but still, there was one more piece in the picture that wasn’t there. The approval from our President, that I will be allowed to go up on stage and kneel in front of everyone to ask the biggest question I am to ask in my entire life.
I went to the fifth floor with “the boys” and with them knowing what I was about to do the next day, as soon as we all lit our first cigarette for the night, the first question was, “where is the ring?”. I took the small grey box that the store gave me and showed them the ring. They were amazed at the simplicity of the design and complimented that it was, indeed, a very nice ring. As soon as the ring returned safely into my pocket, the next question they threw at me was: “We’re you able to give her the planned distraction?” I told them the entire story of how I got to the mall and chose everything, the difficulty in choosing for a ring, and finally getting a nice Fossil wristwatch to match it with. They were all laughing when I told them how my sweetie’s face looked like as soon as I entered our condo unit with the basket of flowers in my hands. “So far, so good”, they said.
Before they could ask the next question, the mobile phone inside my pocket rang.
The call I received was a message from God, delivered by an angel named Ms. Kaye. She is one of the organizers of the event and one of the major names connected to our company’s president. She was happy to tell me that I am being given two minutes on stage, and that I was supposed to see her an hour before the party so that she can fill me in on which part of the program I was supposed to go to the stage and grab the microphone. I could feel all my blood rushing to my brain and it’s as if I could see myself blushing. “Yes!” I said loudly. One of my friends gestured a “thumbs up” to me, as if to ask if my request was approved, and I enthusiastically put up my right thumb in response. Ms. Kaye said goodbye, and that she was looking forward to seeing me the next day, as well as her heartfelt congratulations.
After I received the call, I immediately went to my friends and asked them if it would be okay for them to ‘escort’ my sweetie once I ask for her on stage the following night. It was almost simultaneous when they said that they’d be happy to. I proceeded to the 6th floor of the building and I looked for one of my former agents, Hans, who was into photography. Knowing him, I was pretty sure he would be bringing his SLR along and take pictures of the upcoming event. True enough, when I asked him if it was okay for him to position himself close to the stage the next day, he instantly obliged and congratulated me in advance.
Now, all the pieces are set. The main characters of the play are in their starting positions. The only thing left to do is to lift the curtains.
(to be continued)
I was speaking to a good friend in the office a couple of days ago, just before he got transferred back to the account / program he originally came from. I remembered he approached me and simply said, “Jorge, coach me.” I figured something was up so I locked my computer and went to our usual place to smoke at the back of the building. I’m proud to say that this time around, he was the only one smoking, since I already puffed my last smoke two minutes just before I added another year on my belt.
Anyways, he was simply seeking for guidance on what he needs to do and how he needs to act within the next few hours because he feels lost for the time being. I gave him a few comforting and reassuring words which would be how I would approach a typical coaching session. I tried to apply all the teachings that I’ve encountered in terms of ‘calming the storm’, ‘seeking the paradigm shift’, and ‘persuading the convinced’, since I was talking to another person of almost the same level, if not higher. The coaching session ended satisfactorily, but what I will be trying to point out in this short article I’m making is not the coaching session, but the conversation that happened afterwards. I’m not sure how the discussion shifted from office to personal matters, but if I remember correctly, he mentioned sometime after the coaching session that one of his friends texted him and asked if it was time to propose. The story of ‘the proposal’ then came up and that’s when I realized, it’s been more than six months now since the day I asked the big question in front of hundreds of people.
I’ve been neglectful to myself, to my sweetie, and to those following the story of our lives. I’ve been meaning to write the story of how it all happened but time got the best of all of us, I guess. But here I am now, tapping away at my keyboard, trying to keep my hands from shaking, as the feeling of excitement and anxiety merges once again, as I recall how it all happened; how stressful, yet successful, the night of December 7th, 2008 went.
October 2008 just came in. The plan was simple, my sweetie and I will be celebrating our 10th year together in two months’ time, and finally, I decided on finally popping the question. I know, I know, ten years is a long time to ask THE question, but with all those years, foundations were built, broken down, rebuilt, strengthened, fortified, stormed, went through earthquakes and other disasters, but the days, weeks, months, and years spent building our foundations were the very means for us to survive everything that went our way. We’d like to believe that most relationships that don’t survive are mainly because the foundations weren’t that strong. And there we were, on our way to our tenth year, and I know, I am ready.
I was still in the morning shift when the email came in that the upcoming Christmas Party of the company was going to be a Red and Black Ball, which was perfect for the setting I would like the proposal to be. As soon as I read the email, I went to a fellow coach who I happen to overlap schedules with, Mr. Miguel Cellano, and asked him if he would be willing to help me out if in case I push through with my plan. He was polite enough to congratulate me first in finally making the big decision, and then made a few suggestions, particularly, people, who could, more or less direct me to the right channels. He pointed me to one of the Quality Analysts on the floor who was in direct contact with the organizers of the Christmas Party. Nikki gave me a name, which should have been simple enough to remember, but the last name is something I haven’t really heard before so the retention wasn’t that good. I went to a good mentor, boss, and friend, Adam Fuqua, who I believe could also point me to the right direction, since he has been with the company since day one.
It was October 2nd, when he gave me the email address of the person I was supposed to get in touch with. I immediately constructed my email, discussing the length of time I’ve been with my sweetie, and how many years we’ve been in the same company. I also discussed what the plan was, and the backup plan, if the first one wasn’t at all possible. I showed the email to Adam and asked for his opinion if the email was okay to send to someone of that position. He gave me the go signal after a few revisions, that I should try to keep it as simple as possible, direct to the point since the person I will be sending the email to is someone who don’t have much time since she is a very busy person. Finally, I sent the email, sometime before lunch break. Now that the email has been sent, all I needed to do was wait, and plan the next course of action while waiting. Being in the company for more than two years at the time, I knew for a fact that the thirteenth month pay will be coming in at the last pay of November. Our 10th Anniversary is on the 6th of December, and the timing was perfect, but I had to make backup plans if in case the thirteenth month pay did not push through on the November 30th payout.
October passed and the next update was sometime middle of November, when the email was sent as to when the thirteenth month pay will be actually credited. By this time, everyone was already busy preparing for the presentation of our program to the upcoming Christmas party, which was scheduled on December 7th, 2008. The pay will be credited on December 5th. Timing was crucial, and whenever I think about it, I still feel my heartbeat racing because the days involved were very close to each other, and one mistake in timing could lead to failure. Think about it, December 5th, we get paid our thirteenth month pay, December 6th would be our 10th Anniversary, and December 7th was our Christmas party, where I’ll be making my move. On top of that, I had to make sure I had enough funds to get her something on the actual day of our anniversary, so that she wouldn’t be suspicious that something big was coming the next day. If I fail to give her anything on the day celebrating the decade of being together, then she’ll definitely know that something’s up, and I know her, she can sniff out anything that’s up quite quickly and easily.
So, days and weeks went by from October to mid November and I never received a response from the contact person I emailed on the 2nd of October. I was running out of options, and I was thinking of moving to Plan B, which was to get all employees, from agents to managers in our program to gather outside the Christmas party venue after the event and that’s where I’ll pop the question, inside a circle that everyone will be making. I drafted my email to all management and saved it to be sent later on, should a response not come at all, from the organizer I emailed. Days passed, no response came. I was falling into despair. Nothing seemed to be falling into place. As the weeks went by, I remember checking out jewelry stores inside Glorietta and Greenbelt whenever I had the chance. Whenever we went out on dates, I’d make sure to check out any jewelry store we passed by and tried to do it as secretly as possible, getting business cards and catalogues whenever I could. I checked online for prices but the delivery would definitely put additional costs to it so going to the malls was the only option. I’ve had a couple of suggestions to go to Ongpin, a known place in Manila where I could get a ring for a very reasonable price, but the risk of landing a fake ring and diamond was significantly higher, as compared to getting it from an actual jewelry store inside the mall. Besides, I wanted to make sure that if the ring didn’t fit, I could easily get it fixed, so vicinity was also something to consider. During those days, I also opened up my sweetie’s accessory box and checked out any ring that she may have so that I can get the measurements as close as I could. I even remember lifting her wrist and checking out her ring finger during her sleep.
December came and I remember all the props that will be used for the inter-account competition was fresh with paint, and some were still being constructed. I tried to help out as much as I can, to avoid suspicion that I was planning one of the biggest events of my life, and hers as well. December 5th finally arrived and I checked my bank account every top of the hour, trying to avoid checking it every minute, to hide the anxiety that I was already in. Sometime around 3:00pm, I woke up, since I was already in the nightshift during that month, and checked my balances. Finally, the funds were in. I took a bath and sneaked out of our condo unit, and went to the office to withdraw everything that I was able to save up from the previous payout up to the crediting of the thirteenth month pay. I went up our company’s building and texted Adam one more time, asking him to drop by at the 7th floor to check out another email that I am constructing. That’s when I found out that the email address that I sent my original email to wasn’t spelled correctly, which explains why I never received a response. Adam corrected the email address and I sent it again, just before I went to the mall. December 5th was the only time I could go to the mall to buy the ring, as well as another gift to distract her and avoid giving her an idea of the things to come on the seventh of December, because our anniversary was coming in at midnight, and my sweetie was already on half-day vacation leave so that she could rest from all the work that she did the previous day. The half-day vacation leave is also so she can get her ‘beauty rest’ because I know for a fact she was expecting a proposal on our tenth year together. The timing couldn’t be more critical.
I went to Glorietta and the first thing I did was find the nearest flower shop. It was already 6:00pm and the basket of flowers needed to be ready at 8 or 9pm, where I’m sure she’d be expecting that I’d be at work already. I found a good flower shop and checked out their rates as well as the flowers they currently had. I had them create a basket with two dozen roses, which was what I gave her every year. After paying for it, I went to the shops I previously checked during our dates together. It took me two and a half hours walking from shop to shop until I was able to narrow it down to two jewelry shops. I never realized it was that difficult to find an engagement ring! Anyways, I was able to find a nice, simple ring which I hoped and prayed she would love. After several minutes of negotiations and finally paid for the ring, I went running to the closest fossil watch establishment and chose a professional, yet elegant wristwatch that would match the ring I just bought. I remember trying to feel the ring in my pocket every now and then, because at the time being, the ring was more important to me than life itself. Like I said, one wrong move and everything will be a complete failure.
So, I already have the ring, I have the wristwatch for distraction, and finally, I have the basket of flowers. It was already 9:00pm, and I had to rush back to the condo, where I was sure she was, and had to give her one final frustration, before the proposal. The plan was going along quite well, all I needed was the confirmation that I was approved of the request to have two minutes on stage during our company Christmas party to pop the question. With a basket of two dozen roses in one hand, I went back to the condo, trying to hide the ring at the deepest corner of my bag’s pockets, and unlocked the door. I was happy to see that the lights were still on, which meant she was inside. I opened the door slowly and saw her on the sofa, talking to someone on the phone, probably her mom, and as soon as she saw me, she said goodbye to the person on the other end of the line and said “hi” to me. I asked her immediately what she was doing at home, trying to pretend that I forgot that she was on half-day vacation leave. She then reminded me that she was on leave, and that she told me a few days earlier.
“Oh well’, I said, and gave her the basket of flowers and instantly saw the frustration on her face. So far so good, I thought to myself. I then gave her the small paper bag from Fossil and my heart sank when the frustration on her face remained. Somehow I was expecting that she’d feel better after receiving such an ‘elegant looking’ wristwatch for our anniversary. But then again, it only meant that the plan was working. I told her that I had to go back to the office because it was already time to work so I had to leave her in the unit. The stories from her side, I was unaware of, until she told me that she actually cried as soon as I closed the door, realizing that there was no proposal in store for her.
…to be continued…
Maybe I didn’t treat you
Quite as good as I should have
Maybe I didn’t love you
Quite as often as I could have
Little things I should have said & done
I just never took the time
But you were always on my mind
You were always on my mind
Maybe I didn’t hold you
All those lonely, lonely times
And I guess I never told you
I’m so happy that you’re mine
If I made you feel second best
Girl, I’m sorry I was blind
You were always on my mind
You were always on my mind
Tell me, tell me that your
Sweet love hasn’t died
Give me, give me one more chance
To keep you satisfied
Satisfied
Little things I should have said & done
I just never took the time
You were always on my mind
You were always on my mind
You were always on my mind
You were always on my mind
I’ve been so many places in my life and time
I’ve sung a lot of songs, I’ve made some bad rhyme
I’ve acted out my life in stages with ten thousand people watching
But we’re alone now and I’m singing this song for you
I know your image of me is what I hope to be
I’ve treated you unkindly but girl, can’t you see?
There’s no one more important to me
So, darlin’ can’t you please see through me?
‘Cause we’re alone now and I’m singing this song for you
You taught me precious secrets of the truth withholding nothing
You came out in front and I was hiding
But now I’m so much better, so if my words don’t come together
Listen to the melody ’cause my love is in there hiding
I love you in a place where there’s no space or time
I love you for my life as you are a friend of mine
And when my life is over, remember, when we were together
We were alone and I was singing that song for you
And when my life is over, remember, when we were together
We were alone and I was singing my song for you, oh, for you
I miss her so much.
In less than four week’s time, I was left behind twice. The second time was just last Saturday. She’s probably waking up right now to a wonderful Minneapolis Monday morning and preparing her morning-required coffee. I wish we never had to part ways, but her work demands that she be there to undergo her training. I guess I just need to be thankful that her travels right now are not as lengthy as they were before. I remember being left behind for more or less eight straight months, until I was able to convince her to just come home to me.
This time, I should probably be thankful that it’s only for a couple of weeks, and that sources of communicating with each other are pretty much everywhere. I can’t imagine the two of us being in our parents’ place where the communication they had to go through was strictly by sending actual mail to each other which would probably arrive once or twice a month, when our dads would be in Saudi Arabia, working their butts of so that they could give us a better future. I’m also happy that she’s able to go to places I’ve been to, without us having to worry about coming up with airfare. I remember being in the Mall of America in Minneapolis, Minnesota, and admired how huge the place was. I think I was there for at least 5 hours but was only able to see one side of the building since it was really a huge mall. Someday I’ll probably go back there and make it a point to be able to check the entire mall out, regardless of how huge it is.
Anyways, being apart from each other is something I’m not used to anymore. We have been living together for close to five years now and the longest we’ve been apart was when I went to the US back in February, to attend my sister’s wedding. I have to admit that I have gotten quite used to being with her almost every minute of the day. We even have stations facing each other, so that I could catch a glimpse of her beaming face every chance that I can get. I remember she caught me one time staring at her while she was working. I felt like a high school kid getting caught by my crush while I was staring. It was both embarrassing and heart-warming. How many people can get a chance to be able to look their beloved every minute of the day and actually be happy and feel warm about it? I know couples who can’t wait to be apart from each other, couples who, after being with each other for twenty-five years, would rather part ways, or just argue with each other. For my sweetie and I, even after ten long years, it still feels like we are starting over and over again every time weekend comes. I’m sure we both feel the same way when I say that I wish weekends would have been made three instead of two days so that we can have more time to spend with each other.
Though we have a couple of minor arguments every now and then, because of the foundation we have built through the years, everything can be brushed off easily, or talked about like mature and professional people. I guess there are a lot of reasons why I am very grateful to be in this relationship; being in it has taught me several things and have made me grow the way nothing else could ever make me. I’ve learned to think of the future all the time and how each action I make could have a significant impact on our future. Every action was critical, and that I must make sure every one I made was going to be for both our benefit.
I miss her so much. I miss being able to hold her close to me every weekend and just before I fall asleep. I can’t tell how much I’ve gotten used to falling asleep with her in my arms, trying to protect her even as I fall asleep. It feels heavy waking up not being able to see her sleeping like the angel she is beside me, and not being able to prepare her daily dose of caffeine juice. I even miss the weight of her laptop bag on my right shoulder when I walk to the office. I miss the way she looks like when she eats beside me while we’re at home. It’s like I don’t have any purpose when she’s not around. I think God sent me here so that I can make her life more comfortable, which I hope and believe I am able to fulfill.
Now, all I can do is wait; wait until she comes home and is back in my arms once again. All I can do is sit at home or in front of my desk, try to keep myself busy so that time will pass by easily so that before I know it, I’m already waiting at the ground floor of our building for our company’s van to bring her back to me. Wait until I am able to make her life a little bit more comfortable, less complicated.
God please let her be safe. Until then, I’ll be here, waiting patiently for her…
